From the Ayars' blog...
The Ayars Affairs -- Life in Haiti
interrupted by the I Am.
Posted: 04 Sep 2019 09:36 AM PDT
Last night Matt and I were filling the midnight hours with our deep prayers, and the Lord gave me one I'm holding on to.
Remind me back, family.
The "peace" we've all been living in the last several months in Haiti is deceptive, though we all knew it. The shut down of roads, businesses, schools, transportation, fuel and security last February was never truly resolved...life just resumed after a few weeks. Money had run out and it HAD to break sometime. Prices have continued to rise, fuel has continued to be hard to find, and the president has named his fourth prime minister in less than three years, and even that has yet to be in function.
The last 10 days there has been no fuel, period, no gas, no diesel, which effects every element of life...from the public transportation our students use to come to class to generators hospitals and businesses and the phone company use for power. September 9th is the day all elementary and high schools resume class in Haiti, and that makes right now prime time for those fighting for power and money to wield fear and flaunt injustice.
If fuel continues to be blocked, the country cannot function. If desperate and angry men are paid to burn the country down, to threaten children, to stop all progress, all efforts, all education, all businesses...they will.
As our staff joined again yesterday for Tuesday prayer, the dismay, discouragement and heartbreak was heavy on the faces and hearts of our family. Their pain and burden, which I will never fully be able to identify with, kills me. Since the heavy cloud lifted a bit in March, I have not been the only one battling fear: we cannot go there again. We cannot do that again. I can't do that again.
With threats of evil and rumors of violence and desperation growing and prices STILL soaring and no fuel and school about to start, we are at the brink of there again.
Evil always preys on desperation. On innocent children. On hungry people. It is altogether selfish and dishonest and altogether out to kill and destroy...and it's knocking at Haiti's door again, still, and ready or not, here we are.
Ugly things tend to bring out ugly things in people. Threats bring out fear. Violence brings out hatred. Desperation calls out ungodly responses. Shortage ushers in greed, fatigue allows for injustices that wouldn't have been allowed for on stronger days.
When the economy is weak, when the government is weak, when courage is weak, when systems are weak...we get weak, too. We respond with bitterness and selfishness instead of grace and patience. We respond with fear and frustration instead of being of good courage. We ball up our fists instead of opening them to each other.
When we're weak, we fall for Satan's lies and listen, instead of speaking up the truth.
As we were tempted to despair, to discourage, to embitter, to be angry, to be weak last night, Jesus absolutely interceded for me before the throne with this idea:
We cannot allow the weakness of the world to make us weak, but must allow His strength to make us strong.
We cannot allow the broken to make us broke, but must allow His healing to make us whole.
We cannot allow fear to make us afraid, but must allow the Lord of Heaven's Armies to give us courage.
We cannot allow worries to make us worry, but must allow the God of Peace to make us peacemakers.
We cannot allow the bitter to make us bitter, cannot allow the desperate to make us desperate, cannot allow the harsh to make us unkind, cannot allow the shortage to make us short.
We are His CHILDREN. We are light in the darkness.
Now, friends, now more than ever we must be above reproach, we must cling to what HE IS and let Him SHAPE us, not be shaped by the world. Now more than ever we must be strong and courageous, we must be love in such lostness, we must be His Hope in such despair.
LOVE, darn it.
Do you know why, by His grace, I can do this again, come what may??
Because His Love.
It never gives up.
It never loses faith.
It is always hopeful.
It endures through every circumstance.
1 Corinthians 13:7
THAT kind of love, that is what our brothers and sisters here in Haiti, our children, our country...that is what we NEED TODAY. That is what your corner of the world needs, too, and is desperate for.
If we are doing this again...
If we are doing this again, the Living Water that flows from me will NOT be scorched by it.
If we are doing this again, I will be the resounding voice of HIS love that NEVER gives up, that NEVER loses faith, that NEVER loses hope, that ENDURES. I will spread that, pray that, show that, share that, be that love to our fellow missionaries, to our fellow staff members, to our fellow family, to my children, to His children, to those who are being saved and to those who are perishing.
I'm giving Him my weakness now--for nobody needs it--to be made strong.
He is on the throne. He is well aware. His hand is not short. His work is not finished.
Intercede for us in Haiti. Intercede for this country, for these people. Go to the throne of grace on Haiti's behalf, pray for a NEW DAY, pray for open eyes, pray for brilliant light, pray for a totally different cycle.
But most, pray that His children might be faithful to GIVE what HE is giving, and nothing else. Pray that we might be faithful to LOVE how He is LOVING. Pray that we might be so totally grounded in the Light that He is, that the darkness cannot overcome it.
As far as it depends upon me, the little daily actions and words and inner thoughts of my mind and tongue and heart will testify of the victorious Christ, on the throne unshakable.
And as I beg Him for His help with that commitment this morning, He interrupts me.